A Summer with SKILD: Emma’s Reflections

 Background

Before I was born, my parents adopted a special needs boy named Lawrence. He was born prematurely and weighed under a kilogram. The combination of this preterm birth and his biological mother’s drug addiction caused him to have cerebral palsy. To this day, Lawrence has never rolled over, sat independently, crawled, or walked. Despite his complex medical and developmental challenges, God nudged my parents to adopt my brother.

When a child has physical and/or developmental challenges, the whole family is affected. My brother was 2 years old when I was born and my parents say we connected like twins. If he cried, I cried. When he smiled, I laughed. I learned to stand by leaning on him, and once I could walk I pushed his tiny wheelchair with me. His vocal sounds were foreign to most, but not to me. So, once I started talking, I translated the world to Lawrence and Lawrence to the world.

Lawrence’s cerebral palsy is classified as severe spastic quadriplegia. He got his first power wheelchair at age 3 and continues to need help dressing, eating, toileting, and all other daily living skills. My parents knew that early intervention would dramatically improve my brother’s quality of life, so he had physical, occupational, vision, and speech therapy twice a week starting at a very young age. Many of Lawrence’s therapists would include me in his sessions. This served 2 purposes: I could translate his jumbled language to them, and help him with his “homework” by practicing the skills through play at home. My eyes were opened – my brother and his awesome clinicians gave me a look into the amazing minds of non-traditional learners. Because of Lawrence’s challenges, I had daily contact with people with a variety of physical and developmental abilities. I fell in love with unique learners and the entire special needs community!

Challenges and Gifts

Living with someone who has physical and developmental challenges is difficult. It is not only emotionally and economically taxing, but it is socially isolating for the family. While my parents did all they could to give me and my older siblings the same opportunities as typical American children, our lives were far from typical.

We learned that life was fragile. My siblings and I spent weeks in hospitals when Lawrence had major surgeries. We also discovered that people who look or act differently are often ignored or bullied. My siblings and I had to help with Lawrence’s care, and we didn’t always like to do it. However, Lawrence’s challenges gave all of us a wonderful gift – perspective! He taught us to slow down and appreciate the little things like walking, talking, and – some days – breathing!

Our family was rarely invited to people’s homes because most houses are not wheelchair accessible. Instead, my parents opened our home to friends and family. We did not keep Lawrence or his challenges hidden away. When he was well, Lawrence attended every sporting event and concert our family was involved in. It was good for him, and it was good for our entire community. I have had several highly educated teachers and mentors in my lifetime, but my special needs brother has taught me more than all of them! Lawrence is the most resilient person I know, and I have dedicated my life to doing what he can’t – seeing the unseen and giving voice to the voiceless.

Why Lebanon?

The answer to that question is SKILD! During my last few years of high school, I began thinking more globally. Nontraditional learners and people with physical, emotional, or developmental challenges do not enjoy the same privileges my brother has in the United States. In some places in the world, people like Lawrence are locked away, chained up like animals, or simply abandoned. This broke my heart and motivated me to explore the many ways cultures approach learning in general and non-traditional learners more specifically. While books are helpful, spending time in other countries is the best way to learn about culture – which is what brought me to Lebanon!

In October of 2023, my church introduced me to a vocational ministry organization that does international placements, and they introduced me to SKILD. I immediately went online to see what this program has to offer. I saw programs for children, young adults, and even training and support for siblings and families! This excited me – SKILD is doing everything I want to do once I finish graduate school!

I have spent the last 2 months learning from staff and engaging with students in the ABA and IDEAL programs at SKILD. Lebanese and American educational systems are slightly different, but the needs of students are the same everywhere in the world. Unique learners need more individual attention and instruction than the traditional classroom model can give. The ABA staff recognizes the importance of knowing each child individually.

The students in ABA were incredible! It was an honor to spend quality time observing and learning the needs of several children. One of the biggest highlights of my time in the ABA program was throwing a party to celebrate a student’s graduation. During this student’s time at SKILD, she learned and mastered the tools necessary to move into a mainstream school in the fall! It was a joy to celebrate this milestone!

The IDEAL program was a completely new experience for me. Though I have more experience working with adults with disabilities than children, I have yet to work with non-traditional adult learners in an educational setting. Since these students are high-functioning and have free time built into their schedules, I was able to connect with them on a more relational level. Each day, I assisted the teachers with classroom management, participated in games, and engaged with the students as much as possible. This group of young adults and their teachers are amazing! Their summer semester focused on learning independent living skills (like cleaning, making a bed, and appropriate behavior in public settings) and culminated with a camp to practice these skills. I was only with them for 2 months, and I could see measurable progress in these students’ skills and behavior! Imagine what these students will accomplish after 2 years! The IDEAL program is incredibly well-rounded. It gets students out in the community through outings and internships and has the classroom piece. I am so impressed with this arm of SKILD!

Serving at SKILD exceeded my expectations, and I learned so much! The students and teachers in the ABA and IDEAL programs welcomed me into their community, and I got a first-hand look at the services available to students with special needs outside of the United States. This international experience has inspired me to continue advocating for people with learning challenges in my home country and abroad.

Closing thoughts

Lebanon is a beautiful country. The mountain views, waterfalls, and sunsets take my breath away. It is the Lebanese people, however, that I will never forget. My host family (Costa’s), the staff and students at SKILD, my Arabic tutor, the local churches, and the new friends I have made over the last 2 months have been incredibly gracious and hospitable. Thank you for welcoming me into your lives, homes, and country. Most importantly – SKILD team, thank you for advocating for the unseen and overlooked. May God bless you all!