The five love languages that we all know, words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch are very important to recognize because each one of us has one primary love language. We don’t speak the same love language, so if we don’t speak in our spouse’s love language often, neither of us will feel loved. However, no matter how hard we try to build a solid marriage, we as special needs’ parents face challenges to the emotional glue of marriage. These threats can be time constraints as days are spent caring for the children and their increasing needs as they grow older, financial strain, or even guilt and grief for a child’s missed milestones and setbacks and resenting the demands and limitations of caring for a child with special needs. Isolation, geographical separation, and worrying about the future also present themselves as setbacks to our emotional bonding with our spouse.
Luckily, there are various easy and fast activities pertaining to each love language that we can do to express our love! For words of affirmation, say thank you more often when your spouse brings you a cup of coffee, compliment your spouse’s appearance, and put notes in places in unexpected places. For those whose spouses prefer quality time, have more frequent dates or plan “you time” at home in front of the tv to watch your favorite show after the kids sleep. You can also read your favorite book together, ride bikes, or enjoy a walk in nature. Gifts also don’t have to be expensive and time consuming to find! You can write your spouse a card, get them their favorite snack, buy them a voucher to their favorite shop, and many more simple enjoyable ideas. For acts of service, try to relieve your spouse from chores they don’t prefer like vacuuming, making beds, making dinner, or dressing the children. As for physical touch, it can be as simple as holding hands while watching a movie, cuddling, or having a pillow fight!
